Developing
Confidence Around Women Quickly and Easily
Everyone
knows that a healthy dose of confidence can make the difference
between nights of romance with gorgeous women and nights at home
alone watching DVDs with take out food.
If you don’t have the confidence to ask a woman out, you
are left in the unenviable position of having to wait for her
to come to you. Admittedly,
more women are becoming slightly more aggressive when it comes
to approaching guys, but for the most part if you want to get
a date you are going to need to approach the woman.
.
You
have to be confident. That
is not a revolutionary new observation.
It’s also easy to say.
The real question about confidence is not whether or not
it’s necessary and valuable (it is). The real issue is how to become confident.
Becoming
confident in oneself can be a little challenging. After all, many men have long histories of being
shy or lacking confidence. Changing
long-held behavior patterns can pose something of a challenge. A complete introvert is unlikely to read a single
article and emerge as a complete extrovert. However, there are things you can do quickly
and easily that will encourage you to become more confident. These simple tasks are well worth the effort
and can help you to become a winner with women.
First,
it is important that you demystify your lack of confidence. By stripping the situation to bare bones, you
will learn more about why you tend to lack self-confidence, which
is the first step to become more confident.
Usually, if one really probes the issue of low self-confidence,
they discover that the greatest roadblock is fear.
All
of us have fears and the fear of rejection is high up on many
of our lists. This fear of being turned away can lead many
of us to stop acting in a confident manner.
We understand that self-confidence leads to interaction
and that interaction can lead to real winning relationships, but
we also recognize that interaction creates an opportunity for
a woman to “shoot us down,” so we begin to tame our behavior.
Our lack of confidence, when you get right down to it,
is actually a manifestation of fear.
The
best way to conquer this fear is by examining it objectively. By looking at the matter from an objective point
of view, we will often discover the irrationality of our emotions. When we see how bankrupt our fears really are,
it is easier to defeat them. Ask
yourself, “ what is the worst that can really happen if I appear
more confident around women?”
Consider your answer carefully and honestly.
You will probably find that you fear rejection and embarrassment.
Now,
consider whether or not the negative results of that kind of rejection
or embarrassment outweigh the potential advantages of encountering
the woman of your dreams. Consider
the relationship you really want and compare its value to the
cost of some potential rejection. If you approach the problem with any level of
intellectual honesty, you are sure to conclude that the fears
holding your confidence down are entirely misplaced.
So,
understanding that your lack of confidence is motivated by irrational
fears, you need to take the next step.
You now understand that you should change your behavior
and that the benefits of doing so far outweigh any minor risk
involved. Nonetheless,
changing behavioral patterns can take some time and practice. You cannot quickly and easily change your whole
way of behaving. You can,
however, do some quick and easy things that will significantly
contribute to become more confident.
The
old adage “practice makes perfect” holds true when it comes to
women and confidence. We truly do become more comfortable and talented
at approaching women simply by practicing doing it. For someone who has long suffered from a lack
of confidence, it is probably wise to practice interacting with
women in “smaller doses.” Instead
of trying immediately for a pick up, simply work on interacting
with women in social situations. Get into a short conversation with the girl
in the check out line. Hold
open a door for a girl and say “good afternoon.”
Quick and easy practices with interaction can help you
to eventually conquer a lack of confidence.
With
a bit of practice, first starting with small steps and gradually
growing, you can develop a great deal of confidence.
Along the way you may feel a bit nervous—this is normal
as you conquer failed old behaviors.
It is also easy to combat by reminding yourself of the
irrationality of your fears and the huge benefits of becoming
a more self-confident man.